I’m 34 at the time I’m writing this.
People ahead of me may have the opposite opinion.
I noticed a pattern that happened in my life.
I religiously do something for two years, then I’d stop.
Whether I’m learning a skill or forming a habit, I’d do it for two years, and then I’d stop.
This worked for both good habits and bad habits.
This applied to organizations that I participated in.
I’d go to the gym for two years, and then I’d stop.
I’d practice some martial arts for two years, and then I’d stop.
I was training to become a financial planner, and I decided to leave after two years.
I joined an org that encourages entrepreneurs and provided training.
I then gave up on entrepreneurship after a few years.
I was an atheist for two years, and then I became interested in philosophy and religion.
I was studying philosophy for two years, and then I stopped.
I was a Christian for over two years, and then I’d stop going to church or bible study.
I’d listen to an author, teacher, or mentor for a couple of years, and then my attention would go somewhere else.
I also became a minimalist (for more than two years this time), and I stopped.
I typically don’t have a strong objection to any of the mentioned practices.
Yet I find myself stopping.
For a long time, I’ve been thinking of an answer to this question.
This is the best answer I’ve come up with so far.
And my answer may change in the future.
I’m still exploring but here goes.
You explore these groups and disciplines to experience a benefit.
Whenever I feel that I’m beginning to experience dependence on a practice or group, I’d stop.
As soon as you become “active,” many of these organizations have a “plan” for you.
There were a lot of options and opportunities for you to participate.
Many organizers would like you to go “all in” when it comes to participation.
There’s always some form of “sacrifice” that you are asked to make while people are watching.
There’s also an element of “seriousness” and an expectation that you will incorporate the “brand” into your identity.
There’s also the conversation about how “since you benefited from this ‘new way of life,’ don’t you feel that you have an obligation to pass it on to your friends and loved ones.”
I recognize the pattern so many times, and it ruins the experience for me.
Maybe it’s identical because these elements are fundamental principles in building organizations that stand the test of time.
After all, many of my examples have been around for a long time.
What’s the point of this article Kevin?
I’m considering that if you’ve ever feel overwhelmed, you may simply stop going.
If you’re new, consider staying for two years to learn what you need to learn.
When you’re ready to move on, you’re free to do so.
I’m sure you have some notes and resources, go study that.
If you don’t have notes, begin writing them from memory.
Go back to your past experiences and retrieve the lessons.
Now that nobody is watching begin applying the good stuff and best practices that will benefit your life.
Start with as little as you can.
You don’t need to go to that weekend seminar or a large group to cheer you.
The notes that you took a few years ago will do.
You can always come back when you feel like it.
You’re free to pare down your commitments.
By Kevin Olega
Thank you for reading.
If you have a question or would like to say anything tweet or send me an email.